Who will love you? Who will fight? Who will fall far behind?

WHAT is going on with this British weather? Seriously? Scorching sun yesterday, where I was melting, and then today the one day I'm dressed for summer (in a little playsuit). It is pissing down with rain and we have a thunder storm. Talk about indecisive. 


So I've been thinking (after talking to a close friend)... I want to make a list of things I want to do before I die. I know it sounds so cliche like on Titanic when Rose goes and does all the things her and Jack were planning on doing. But in all seriousness, I want to accomplish all these things, before I die. 


1. Pass my driving test (the way things are going at the moment I shall be waiting a LONG time!)


2. Pass my A-levels and get into a university of my choice. HA


3. Go to Heathrow and get on the first flight that comes up on the departures board


4. Learn to play the guitar to a sufficient standard 


5. Go on a road trip with all my closest friends across America


6. SEE DRAKE LIVE! 


7. Get a meaningful tattoo


8. Go on a hot-air balloon at 5 o'clock in the morning with someone I love


9. Go to Las Vegas on my 21st birthday with my best friends, and lose more money then I can afford


10. Run the Sahara desert marathon 


11. Keep a diary for a WHOLE year


12. Go on safari 


13. Take a gap year, before or after university - and do the most amazing things, like building an orphanage etc.


14. Learn to cook a really really good meal for family and friends


15. Have the biggest 21st birthday party EVER and invite everyone I know


16. Become vegetarian for a month 


17. Live in New York for at least 2years


18. Find my dream house


19. Go to the finals of Wimbledon


20. Go to Glastonbury 


21. Visit 10 captial cities 


22. See John Mayer live


23. Live in Camden Town


24. Go to Disneyland with my best friends 


25. Be successful in my career


26. Have at least 4 children


27. Fall madly in love


I can't think of any more at the moment. But I know I'll add to that list - although I do think I have my work cut out, to try and achieve all of those things! But I am determined to do it. 


It's weird to think that I'm nearly 18, and that I hopefully will have done a few of the things on the list this time in a year. Ah, somedays I wish I was older, more grown up. But other times I feel so unprepared for the "real world" --- no wonder I love Peter Pan. 

Men and women have the innate ability to bring out the poison in one another.

Been a hectic week to say the least. Had my work experience so been in London dealing with the hustle and bustle of busy city life. Tubing, walking and what not. I had an amazing week, although be it tiring and draining, it gave me an insight into the music industry and the stress it entails. So interesting, and something I definitely would love to consider doing in the future. So hopefully, fingers crossed, watched this space. 


On top of my heavy week, I realised that your mind set and physical state REALLY really effects your actions. And how you gage a situation. In my tired state I am so over-sensitive, more so then usual and yes I am a very sensitive person to say the least. Being in this sensitive, tired mind set - I think I've just ruined one of the best things ever. Such an error. So annoyed with myself. My blog title has never been more appropriate, you never see it coming you just get to see it go... 


On a lighter note, I have found what I'm gonna do to my hair in the summer. SO excited. The weather and Glastonbury is definitely exciting me for the thought of VFEST. Eeeek. 

Not so sure if it'll suit me. I desperately hope so! If not, you only live once and I cut the ends off? Just not so sure if my hair is long enough yet, as it is only just passed my collar-bone... Hmmm. We'll see. I'll upload some photos when I've done it. Wish me luck. 

Hope you have a good one. 

B x

I know you still think about the times we had.

L O V E 

I love the word love. I love love. The way it looks on paper, the way it sounds, everything. I think that's why we all get so confused on when to use it, because it sounds so lovely and looks so pretty. In the English language it stresses me that we use one word for so many different emotions, for example - in Greek love has different words for different types, like Agape - unconditional love, Eros - passionate and sexual love, Philia - brotherly love and friendship love and Storge - affectionate love. 

Why can't we do that? It would save on a lot of confusion. 

Everyone loves love - we have countless amounts of love songs on our iPods and nearly every single movie involves a love story, with a leading man and leading lady falling for one another. It's cute yes, but makes us feel like we're living in a fantasy of a love filled world where everything eventually works out how we want. And that we all fall in love with the right person. To our dismay it doesn't quite work like that. We are faced with problems such as, friends falling in love with other friends' boyfriends, best friends falling in love with best friends when the feeling is not mutual, families hating your boyfriend/girlfriend, age problems, gender problems. The list goes on and on. Movie's have tainted and corrupted our view on love, it's not fair. Setting us up for disappointment. Although I say that, l o v e - sometimes, a lot of the time, manages to erase all these problems. Which is amazing how one emotion can do that...

Love is perplexing - takes years to try and work it out. And even then you aren't guaranteed to understand it! But we all love it. A bittersweet thing. It's like an addiction, once you've had a taste of it, you thrive to reach it in a relationship/friendship. 

So here is an appropriate song, that I love... <3 

Anyway, hope your week is going well and the weather gets better. Making me think that festivals this year will be filled with rain, smelling of wet dog, sweat and mud even more then last year. 

Have a good one. 

B x

I guess we're like water and a flame. Water and a flame...

I feel quite lost now I've finished all the questions. There was such a structure to my blog, now I'm back to chaos. Aaaah.


School is SO pointless at the moment, I had ONE lesson today. Yes although that sounds great, the reality of it is that I got so bored. Such a waste of time, I should have used my time wisely - because now I'm sat here writing my Business Studies essay on Ryan Giggs's super-injunction. BLAH. Such an effort. I've finished all my exams so am most definitely on summer mode. Which I've been in since just before half term now, it's beginning to become a bit of a problem if I'm honest. No constructive work being done. Hence now not doing my essay, but blogging instead. 


Ah, although - refound my old Justin Timberlake - JUSTIFIED album. I absolutely loved this album when it came out, actually what am I saying?! I still absolutely love this album. I remember going to watch his tour (had to drive 4hours to go and see him in Sheffield! Dedication I think so) and being transfixed on him, he's not just an amazing singer but an equally as good dancer too. Was possibly one of the best concerts I've ever been to to date.  And I've been to more then my fair share. Oh how I love him <3 


Also, I've been listening to Drake's new song which isn't out yet. I also love it, I really really REALLY want to go and see him in concert with I.S - my goal to do when he's next touring. 

Here's also some pretty photos... Cos I like them... 

Have a good one. 

B x

I left you heartbroken, but not until those very words were spoken.

Day 01 - Your favourite film

Day 02 — A song that makes you happy

Day 03 — Your favourite food

Day 04 — A photo of you taken over ten years ago

Day 05 — Your day, in great detail

Day 06 — Your favourite television program

Day 07 — A song that makes you cry (or nearly)

Day 08 — Your favourite book

Day 09 — A photo that makes you happy

Day 10 — A hobby of yours

Day 11 — Your favourite song

Day 12 — An art piece

Day 13 — Your family

Day 14 — A photo of you taken recently

Day 15 — Your favourite actress

Day 16 — A recipe

Day 17 — Your favourite possession

Day 18 — A website

Day 19 — A song that makes you want to dance

Day 20 — Your favourite quote

Day 21 — A non-fiction book

Day 22 — Your favourite memory

Day 23 — A photo you took

Day 24 — What you can see from your window

Day 25 — A talent of yours

Day 26 — Your favourite actor

Day 27 — A photo that makes you angry/sad

Day 28 — A fiction book

Day 29 — What you wore today

Day 30 — Hopes, dreams and plans for the next year

A fiction book, well I've technically answered this question. About my book, When I Was Five I Killed Myself - Howard Buten, but I love reading so I'll choose another book. Trainspotting -  Irvine Welsh is such a fantastic book definitely one of my favourites. Although it is so hard to read due to the fact it is written in Scottish dialect. But if you watch the film then read the book it's easier to understand. I love it. 

What I wore today, well considering I'm still not 100% and the fact that the weather is so weird. One minute I'm roasting, on the verge of SWEAT, yes SWEAT. The next I'm freezing and have to put on a jumper or waterproof due to the torrential rain. So today, I wore a casual and simple, vest-type maxi dress. It's khaki green and sooo comfy. Apart from the fact I'm actually much smaller then I thought, as the dress was literally drowning me. Providing it very difficult for me to walk as I'm dyspraxic and can't walk like a normal person in general. However, I love the dress so there. 

Hopes, dreams and plans for the next year. It's a difficult question to answer, as the answer can verge on cliche. I'll be in my last year at school, probably have chosen my university to go to, or hopefully will have applied for an apprenticeship in a company I'd like to work in. I'm not going to say, "have a lovely boyfriend who I'm so happy with. Blah blah." because, well just because. I may not want a boyfriend? Or I may have just gotten out of a relationship etc. I'm excited about the future, and growing up, I feel like I've grown out of education and being with the same people all the time. No matter how amazing and lovely they all are. Time for a change again. I like change. 

      Currently watching the tennis, Queens. I love tennis, absolutely LOVE Wimbledon and am determined to go this year. I haven't really realised it 'till recently that we actually have loads of cool events that go on in London, well the UK as a whole. Wimbledon, Portabello/Nottinghill/Camden Market, Silverstone, Good-wood Races, Royal Ascot, Cartier Polo, Nottinghill Carnival, Hyde Park Festivals, Reading Festival, V Festival... The list goes on. You don't necessarily realise how different and alternative London, the UK is until you visit other countries or think about it! Aaaah, CANNOT WAIT FOR SUMMER. Fast forward me to then? 


Have a good one. 


B x


PS. Felt the photos were appropriate, London and ice-cream for the summer! 

You know this is your biggest mistake - what a waste, what a waste, what a waste.

Day 01 - Your favourite film

Day 02 — A song that makes you happy

Day 03 — Your favourite food

Day 04 — A photo of you taken over ten years ago

Day 05 — Your day, in great detail

Day 06 — Your favourite television program

Day 07 — A song that makes you cry (or nearly)

Day 08 — Your favourite book

Day 09 — A photo that makes you happy

Day 10 — A hobby of yours

Day 11 — Your favourite song

Day 12 — An art piece

Day 13 — Your family

Day 14 — A photo of you taken recently

Day 15 — Your favourite actress

Day 16 — A recipe

Day 17 — Your favourite possession

Day 18 — A website

Day 19 — A song that makes you want to dance

Day 20 — Your favourite quote

Day 21 — A non-fiction book

Day 22 — Your favourite memory

Day 23 — A photo you took

Day 24 — What you can see from your window

Day 25 — A talent of yours

Day 26 — Your favourite actor

Day 27 — A photo that makes you angry/sad

Day 28 — A fiction book

Day 29 — What you wore today

Day 30 — Hopes, dreams and plans for the next year

A talent of mine, I can make my tongue go into the shape of a butterfly. Yes some may say this is disgusting but a lot of people can't do it. So I think it's pretty cool. Plus I can also fit my whole fist into my mouth, as well as a whole paper cup. I don't know whether you can classify these things as talents. But I can't think of anything else? And not many people can do them, so in my opinion they're unique and different. Therefore a talent, right? 

My favourite actor - has to be either, Johnny Depp SO GORGEOUS and comes across as such a down to earth amazing guy. Loved in him Willy Wonka, Finding Neverland all the Pirates Of The Caribbean and Secret Window. I also love Michael Cera, I've mentioned him in previous posts as my favourite film, Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist has him playing the leading role. I also love Superbad and Juno both of which have him playing the lead guy. Although he isn't very versatile with his roles, alas I still have so much love for him. I want to marry him! 

I don't have a photo that makes me angry/sad. Apart from some of the PostSecrets, a lot of the secrets sent in are so sad. 

Half term ran away way too fast. Had such a good week though, although I do wish it had been another week longer due to the fact I didn't get to catch up with everyone I wanted. But there's always summer. Crazy to think the next holiday from school I'll be on with be my summer of 2011. Exciting but kinda scary at the same time, so much to look forward to such as - girls holiday to Spain, weekend trip/road trip to Paris, work experience, VFESTIVAL, family holidays... The list is endless. However the DREADED result day is soon approaching us, which could single handedly RUIN my WHOLE summer. So we'll have to wait and see. 

Can't stop listening to it. Reminds me of I.S <3 

Have a good one. 

B x

I HATE MISSING PEOPLE. 

Why am I still waiting? Cause while you decide. I'm f*cking suffocating.

Day 01 - Your favourite film

Day 02 — A song that makes you happy

Day 03 — Your favourite food

Day 04 — A photo of you taken over ten years ago

Day 05 — Your day, in great detail

Day 06 — Your favourite television program

Day 07 — A song that makes you cry (or nearly)

Day 08 — Your favourite book

Day 09 — A photo that makes you happy

Day 10 — A hobby of yours

Day 11 — Your favourite song

Day 12 — An art piece

Day 13 — Your family

Day 14 — A photo of you taken recently

Day 15 — Your favourite actress

Day 16 — A recipe

Day 17 — Your favourite possession

Day 18 — A website

Day 19 — A song that makes you want to dance

Day 20 — Your favourite quote

Day 21 — A non-fiction book

Day 22 — Your favourite memory

Day 23 — A photo you took

Day 24 — What you can see from your window

Day 25 — A talent of yours

Day 26 — Your favourite actor

Day 27 — A photo that makes you angry/sad

Day 28 — A fiction book

Day 29 — What you wore today

Day 30 — Hopes, dreams and plans for the next year

What a silly question, my favourite memory. I have so many that stand out such as, jumping out of a moving bicycle taxi, in Piccadilly with three very drunken friends. Getting really over excited one Christmas when I was about seven, and then aggressively biting my sister's arm and making her bleed/cry. Such good memories from every holiday I've been on particularly our girls "tennis tour" trip to Portugal. Not forgetting nearly ever Camden Locks trip in the summer-time. Ah eeeek. 

A photo I took... Of the gorgeous Steve Jones, T4 presenter. Saw him at V-fest last year, so exciting. Apart from he comes across as an arrogant ar*e if I'm honest. But he's so good-looking it's almost acceptable. He even smiled for the photo! Can't wait for V-fest this summer! 

What can I see from my window, well - I wasn't sure whether to take a photo from what I see from my London window. Or my "country" house window. So I didn't take one from either, as it's rather a boring sight. Either fields or the river Thames. Meh. 

Has been a hectic couple of days. Had the fourth of June, at Eton - which definitely did NOT live up to my expectations. Although it was so nice to see everyone and have a brief catch up. And it was sunny for ONCE, as I came home sunburnt, drunk, tired, smelling of champagne (better then beer I must say) and in a very confused mood. 

Then have been in London for the past two days, was good to catch up with friends there too. Had such a fantastic night with some very close friends. It's amazing how time passes so quickly when you're having a good time, and how much you forget you enjoy certain peoples company. Especially with the amount of champagne which was consumed last night. 5 bottles between 4 of us. Never a good combo! I am now very much paying for my half term antics. Feeling rotten due to not enough down-time I think, but it's been worth it. If only I could be ill on Sunday... Not in half term! ARGH not fair. 

Work tomorrow, ahhhhhh no. Having to walk down Eton high street in my teeny weeny white shorts, which show 40% of my ar*e. Not to mention my pasty white legs too! Attractive. Why do I have to be Swedish? Why not Italian or Spanish? Something with a nice skin tone. 

Anyway, hope you've all had a good week. 

Have a good one. 

B x