It's becoming something that's impossible to ignore.

Today, has been a day full of reflection. Whether that is a good thing or not I'm not entirely sure yet... Some painful memories, however a lot were the complete opposite and ones I hope never to forget. Particularly one of my dear friend Lulu jumping out of a moving bicycle taxi at a ridiculous hour in the morning whilst i was munch away on an orange with two other dear friends. Hahah. Quite surprised i can remember if i'm brutally honest. 


Anywho, I've was thinking a lot today, never a moment where my brain didn't seem to be thought processing - in result of this, I realized that we all try to do many things in life to be 'noticed' by the person we are deeply besotted or attracted to, and seem to forget that a lot of the time there is no need. If someone doesn't love you, want to be with you, for yourself than really, what is the point?
Somehow we created a show, a play, a character of someone who we aren't, in order for someone that we love to love us how we desperately want to be loved. The reality of this, is that we are forced to pretend, pretend to be someone we are not and i guarantee that the person you have created isn't half and amazing as you truly are! Honestly, I mean it.

My thoughts on this are, to be yourself, all you can be is someone that can be loved. The rest is up to them, and if they don't seem to see how different, unique and wonderful you really are - then they are by no means worth your time, love and let only tears. (And yes i do understand i am i fine one to talk about this subject, yes you may call me a hypocrite haha but still i'm offering my advice, it doesn't mean i take it.) Yet another result of this thought is now that I'm extremely tired and my brain hurts. Too much thinking, it's not good for you haha. If thinking was an exercise for you body, not mind I would be size 0. Alas...


I'm very excited for tonight, seeing some tremendous actresses - performing their A-level drama practical. I know they will be breathtaking as always, and of course i cannot wait to see some old friends who i sorely miss. 


Sad thought - NO MORE CREW :( I miss our little family, our sessions of piss taking and shouting with a teacher who cannot control us, especially on a sugar high from the biscuits or on a caffeine high due to too much coffee. Thursdays shan't be the same. Hehe. 


Oh and secret diary was fantastic as always, who knew Tim would be so cute!! Eee. Shame he was gay... and for God's sake Ben and Bell sort your lives out and settle down already. Next week looks incredible, yes i know i seem to say that every week but it's true. 


Ah nearly Friday thank the Lord. Weekend aaaaaaaah - it is a much needed one! Anyways 


Have a good one. 


B x